rosie-posie!

Mom, don't squeal! i know you love flowers! haha! these are from hyde park! yup, really nice and brilliant! this is what spring is about! beautiful flowers all around, in full bloom! really lovely!

Life ain't a bed of roses.

the way down...

Shimmie misses the familiarity of things.
There's this sudden feel of loss and emptiness.
I need a lift.

and there are loads of bugs in my room!!!! spring woke them all up and they are flocking in droves to my room!! Ugh! i hate the job of collecting their lifeless bodies in the morning! and phyllis keeps telling me the story of how the queen of the bugs would come and seek revenge on people who mistreat the bodies of the bugs by laying and hatching eggs in the person's body, resulting in me having to gingerly pick the green mass of legs, wings and bodies with tissue, gently wrapping them up while saying a prayer to let their poor souls rest in peace.

there are just so many of them on the ceiling above my bed. and directly above where i place my head when i sleep!!! i'm going to have to switch positions tonight so that the bugs won't drop into my mouth when i sleep! UGH! one bad thing about spring. and apparently it just gets worst!

the bug count just rose to 20. damn.

pookies!

i feel like a pookie! with all the spikes and everything! i'm in a foul mood! stay away! growls!

but who wouldn't melt at the sight of such cutie-pie chocolate porcupines (pookies!) sitting in the basket waiting for someone to pick them up. i saw them at the market in Barcelona and they were simply irresistable! somehow i dont know what came over me but i DIDN'T buy any of them!!! Retard! kicks myself! bah! they're now sitting on my desktop, cheering me on!

thanks pookies! :)

the people of the trip!

Here are my travelmates, xiufang, jasmine and serene!
and yes, i'm staggering the upload of all the pictures. i'm only doing it when i feel like it so patience, guys... at least i'm uploading them now! :)

Gaudi in Barcelona

Gaudi, the great master of design and architecture. we visited his work of arts and they were really impressive. i felt like i was on another planet!
the last photo was taken on the roof of la pedrera and through the arch, you can see another of Gaudi's famous works, the Sagrada Familia.

buildings in Barcelona

Yes, nice little verandas...

Barcelona!

let me see, we've got here pictures of the...
nice beach at my seafront hostel in barcelona
along the shopping district las ramblas
musicians playing jazz outside Topshop at las ramblas
port vell, which was near my hostel too
black and white photo of las ramblas

an occasion for celebration?

i am never one for celebrations or festivals. i always prefer to keep them a quiet family affair or if it appeals to me, occassionally, with a group of close friends. celebrations and festivals are more or less a circumstance for me, if i do go through the motion of celebrating them. christmases, new years, birthdays, valentines' day... they all come and go, in a matter of seconds, and life still goes on the way it should, at least that is the way it has been for a typical student like me. but ever since i came to london, certain days of the calendar just stand out in my face, beckoning for some form of celebration, or in the very least, some form of recognition. they become more important and they have a greater role to play, symbolising a lot more than just simple plain dates in a month, as they would be if i were back at home.

they became a vital indication of care and love from my loved ones back at home, almost as if i am afraid of being forgotten.
they were also timely parcels of warmth and strength to keep me going in a foreign land.
i can't over emphasize how much these dates mean to me now that i'm still far away from home.

so when xmas 2006 came and went, new year 2007 came and went, birthday came and went... and the well wishes that never came... the first 3 big occasions spent away from home only serve as big ugly reminders of how stupid and naive i can be in a relationship. and i just cannot forget how they were so conveniently forgotten. it only showed that i didn't matter too much, did i? it was a gaping wound that was left to fester on its own until school and other commitments temporarily drew my attention away. but the hurt and pain never left. not for one single moment. 'betrayed' is the word to use.
valentines' day could probably have been an attempt to set things on the path again, but by then, i was just too cynical and jaded by everything that has happened. all the lame excuses and feeble attempts.

maybe it's best to forget the past and let time heal all wounds. ha. ha. pardon the cliche. even i find it hard to stomach.

on a lighter note, i'm still mugging! to all who still care, yes, i'm mugging and getting ready for the exams! :)

mug the shit out.

I chanced upon several acquaintances' blogs on one of my usual random blog surfs and it's a wonder how much motivation these people have to study hard. I find it hard to stay focused and mug my shit out. i guess it's because i've more or less had things easy and i've not want anything that badly before, always expecting that things will work out on their own. well, i don't really have things easy. i have to work hard but i just don't, at least not enough to get where i think i really want to. eventually i just compromise on my standards and make up excuses like i'm good where i am too. it's bad... and i know it is. i want to do well but not badly enough cos i always end up cutting myself too much slack. and it's about a week to the end of hols and four freaking weeks to exams. well, technically speaking, i still have time if i mug my shit out.

please shimmie, for once, don't compromise on your standards.

i shall post my study progress on my blog everyday from now on. seriously, i don't have a life. but it's only for this month at least. once the freaking exams end, i can get my life back. and i can feel freaking good about it. afterall, i've enjoyed myself so much for the past few months in london so it's seriously time to just pull my socks up and mug my shit out.

get over the inertia shimmie!

Spring's here to chase away me fat blues!

You know you're fat when you're sitting at your table studying, feeling like there's this huge weight pressed against your heart and when your upper body is supported by washboard like layers of fat on your tummy...

wierd, and i've been running at the gym... now i can't eat without ever feeling like exploding... crosses fingers and pray i'll slim down by the time i get back home! don't want mom to keep saying i'm fat and i should eat less... eating less has never been an option for me! i just try to work out more but it takes long to work off everything i've accumulated this far...

i miss home!

i miss being skinny! for once i can say i'm erm, fat! haha! nah, it's not become a blinding obsession for me to lose weight yet, or ever, cos 1. i'm too busy mugging for exams 2. food therapy works best for me when i'm stressed from mugging so it's a vicious cycle if you see what i mean. you have to lose weight, but all your effort is devoted to mugging, and on top of that you're inclined to eating more than normal cos you're stressed from mugging, so you eat, you put on those fats, and you feel you have to lose weight, but all your effort is devoted to mugging, and on top of that... haha! i sure know how to make myself feel better!

St Jame's park is coming to life! it's finally spring, i can say! the sun was glorious though it was coupled with blasts of chilly wind but that didn't stop scores of people from sprawling across the lawns of mother nature and soaking in the sun! The squirrels are out to play again! they look really thin though and now they're out and about scrounging for food to store up for the next winter! i love squirrels!!! there were many birds at st jame's and they sure were envious of the furry squirrels cos the frisky creatures took all the limelight, bushy tail, doe eyes and all! you can't help falling in love with them sqwarrels! :)

pot of gold

Haha! i cooked my first perfect pot of rice today! ever since the Demise of The Rice Cooker, i had to use my trusty old pot to cook rice for quite a while and i've finally mastered the technique so today i had nice well-cooked brown rice with slightly charred bits at the base! i'm getting good man! and dinner was heavenly by my culinary standards! omelette with shallots and button mushrooms, prawns with diced peppers in tomato and basil sauce decked on butter lettuce! smacks lips and pats myself in contentment! once again, i've surpassed myself! haha!
and yes, the pictures! well... i haven't even loaded them onto my laptop! it's been a mad frenzy to finish that dratted microeconomics textbook but i'm about to be done with it! :) finally!
talk about personal achievement man! haha!

back from spain!

Alright alright... i'll post the pictures on real soon! but just to say i'm still very much alive and kicking! though it was a whole lot of crazy walking in spain! to my dear travelmates serene xiufang and jasmine, you guys are great! find myself often amused by the eccentricities and the dynamics of the group! would definitely have been different without you guys! so now, let's trudge through the remainder of the holidays with a heavy heart and study study study!

thanks mom and dad for letting me go on this trip! don't worry i didn't bust a hole in my pocket from shopping, i didn't really do much shopping, seriously! you guys know me, i hate shopping! haha! love you! you rock! and yes, the pictures will come on erm, in a few days' time? hopefully! haha!